2005: Year In Review

Starts with: 2005 started in Noumea, standing on the beach with my feet buried in the sand that I've always felt is like velvet. I was yearning, again, on this night of nights, to be deep in someone's arms, to hear "I love you" and to feel it under my skin. Instead, again, on this night of nights, I was far from the person sharing my life. Physically, he was somewhere behind me, silent, as we stood on Anse Vata beach, my favourite place in this part of the world. Emotionally, we were far apart. It was not a great trip. We barely spoke, laughed even less, had sex just once. Neither of us could be bothered going to the chemist for preservatifs, as R had done at the same chemists eight-odd years earlier.

...And ends with: 2005 has been the year of friendship for me. I've discovered the power and importance of friends and they continue to surprise me with their love, support and funness. It's also been the year of really getting to know myself, moreso than any other time in my life. It's a continual journey but I'm finding my honest, true self. And that's just the bestest.

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